Written in honor and in gratitude for Send Me On Vacation
The last day of my mermaid retreat, as vision boards were held in our laps, we took turns in the circle to talk about our vision board image. I was the last, and unexpectedly, lost it. Arriving late due to fatigue, I had little time with the leftover magazines to put something together, but it turned out perfect. At the top was the word 'love' with a double platinum ring entwined and blossoming images to display desires of love, beauty and romantic destinations. When it came my turn, I spoke of the expectations of me to be strong (exhaustively strong) and that since a toddler, expectations have been so high that most think I can take absolutely anything thrown at me. But, I'm also fragile and weary from an arduous, and even brutal journey I've been swimming through mostly alone... and for what feels like a lifetime. I put my broken heart in the middle of the circle and let the tears flow. Crying is not something I did much (other than when in immense physical pain) because there wasn't anyone but me to pick up the pieces. It felt good to let go in a room of women (I'd never met but shared common ground with) where I felt safe to fall apart just a little.